projection (maybe again)

HOW freaking much of my feelings about my relationships and my interactions with a wide variety of people (mostly men of course) was projection!!??You know - good old fashioned I see3 this in someone else, but in another (very close!) reality, it's more to the point of I want this from this person and I'm going to think/act/feel like that feeling i want is coming from them, instead of me.
We need a definition here..."In psychology, psychological projection (or projection bias) is a defense mechanism in which one attributes to others one’s own unacceptable or unwanted thoughts or/and emotions. Projection reduces anxiety by allowing the expression of the unwanted subconscious impulses/desires without letting the ego recognize them. The theory was developed by Sigmund Freud and further refined by his daughter Anna Freud, and for this reason, it is sometimes referred to as "Freudian Projection". (thanks Wikipedia)

And it's a defense mechanism too, so what was I defending against? I think I was defending against being hurt, because I felt my mom and dad (more so my father) did not love me.

How do you tell anything about our own feelings when so much of human interaction is related, conjoined, tied together, pre-singulation and post-singulation?

I ppick up on so many feelings, thoughts, realities, etc. with and around others. I never saw myself as the sensitive Pisces until recently, seeing quite clearly that my sensitivity coupled with my intensity got me involved in quite a few more interesting situations and relationships. again, esp. with men.

I had a dream last night that Jolly and I had a great big fight (quite literally) and that after my realization that by her being taller than me, stronger than me and she could hurt me!, I had to agree to give up seeing Michael..

Many times (lately) I believe that w/o my will and ambition I would have never accomplished anything - maybe my drive was another form of escape uh?

Words

Because I routinely mispronounce my new 'big words'...



In case you missed it. Here is the Washington Post 's Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.

The winners are:

1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.

2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

9. Inoculatte: To take coffee! intravenously when you are running late.

10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

12. Karmageddon: It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes, and it's a serious bummer.

13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you

14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.